Once an ACSian–Always an ACSian

Recieved my posting this morning at 10am sharp and this is what i got:

1.	You are posted to	SAF OETI.
2.	Your vocation is	AUTO TECH - A VEH.

Well, with this, my dream of becoming an SAF Officer has just been shattered. My hope for a SAF Scholarship is also lost. Many people seeing this will probably be like "Heys! this is quite good what. 8am-5pm job! Can slack and enjoy civilian life." Sorry but I definitely do not feel this way! While many others are celebrating because they got the slack vocation, I can only feel distraughted and confused. All my initial plans are now gone and looks like I have to request for deferment for my UK University application. And with my family financial backgroud, I do not think I might even have enough to go to UK. Guess I will have to settle for another few years of Singapore education. THANKS AR ARMY for spoiling all these!

Apparently I got down pes to pes C, which means I am not considered combat fit, due to my weight not suitable for my height. To me, this is so screwed up! How can you deem whether a person is combat fit base on his BMI. This is so nonsensical! Guess this experience only taught me one thing: ARMY IS USELESS AND STUPID!

This vocation is NON-COMBAT vocation! I have already resigned to fate that I may not get into OCS because I failed IPPT but I did not expect myself to get posted to a non-combat vocation. After all, I really do not see myself being non-combat fit except that maybe I have low stamina for long distance running, thats all! Even my relatives and friends are so surprised I got downgraded to pes C. Seems like I shouldnt have built my muscles when I was young then. Could have stand a better chance.

And to think that I even wanted to do my best during my NS days. Seems that they do not appreciate my efforts at all. Even though many people have been telling that NS is not worth my time and sweat becuase it really is a bloody waste of 2 years but yet I insists that no matter what, we should always do our part and serve the nation to the fullest. Now, I guess its really not worth my effort anymore! What more can I really say?

Well, I am really in a super bad mood now! As I am typing this, tears are trying to form yet I tell myself there is no point crying over NS. IT IS JUST NOT WORTH IT! HAIZ. I really do not want to discuss this further, I guess all I want to do now is really to be quiet alone and hopefully time will really heal wounds. So if I ever flare up or seemed damn pissed when any of you ask for my vocation, please do not be offended. It is not your fault.