Once an ACSian–Always an ACSian

yes! another subject done!

Now left…
1) Physics SL
2) Maths HL paper 2
3) History HL paper 3

will be ending my exams on fri(4/7/2008) and ill get back my freedom again!

maths paper 1 2day was both good and bad. section A was rather do-able…so im hoping 2 get good score 4 this. but section B was a killer…espeically when i left a 19marks qns BLANK!!! i was like stun! stunned! and more stunned!

but it was not a time 4 me 2 get emo and upset abt it.

cuz i had chemistry paper 3 right after that! luckily 4 me…paper 3 was much much do-able than paper 1 and paper 2. although i stunned at certain qns and blank-ed out awhile…it was still ok overall.

now gotta chiong physics! 2mr is an all-physics day 4 me! and i know i sux at physics…even though since sec3…i always anyhow whack anyhow tikam and somehow managed 2 attain a not-too-bad grade.

People have eyes in the front so that they can forget the past and just look towards the future.
For love happens when you least expect it,
Because there is no logic in love and falling in love has always been an irrational thing.
A person will therefore mature after going through a painful bitter love.

another stay-at-home-and-mug day!

woke up at 9.30am and started mugging at 10am.

spammed maths e whole morning and afternoon. took a 2hr break before spamming chemistry (chem all e way thru e night also).

i guess i probably need more rest…brains not working properly =( cant seem to get anything into my head currently…and there is alot 2 study 4 chemistry =( and maths paper 1 2mr…no calculator =( haiz…im too used 2 using calculator liao…so im doomed 2mr =(

in short…2mr is doomsday no. 2!!!

will probably slp quite late 2nite…considering i hav 1 more whole chapter 2 go =(

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The white windmills whirling silently,
The feeling of reality appears so surreal.
The beautiful sea and the intricate tears,
Watch your silly grin when you clasp my hand.

I hope this dream has no end,
So let us just walk till here
Because I do not wish for this bliss to end so soon.
It is a pity that there is no blessing, I do not feel lonely when loving you,
I just know I will not let you cry again.

I will carry you till the end, so can we not turn back?
You embraced me, telling me you do not need any promises.
You said I will have more freedom if I am by myself.
I do not understand what you mean, regardless, I will not let go of your hands.

I will carry you till end, so can we not think too much?
Will we still be holding hands, even if we reach the end later?
You said we should not meet anymore for this brief moment,
Thanks for letting me know, for I will still be here waiting till enternity.

had buffet lunch @ sakura as part of my dad’s birthday celebration…lol! then went shopping!

was studying in the morning…then studied in the car…then studied while shopping…then returned home and study again…lol! and because i was studying…didnt go 4 ndp =( but they had more than enough trainers as usual so got me no me…makes no difference.

as usual…night time reserved 4 lifesaving training =)

shall return 2 my books now! although it is like already 11+pm..lol!

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The sky is so gray that it looks like it just cried.
After leaving you,
I did not get more freedom.

The sourness of the air
Is coming from our heart.
A scene of heart-wrenching ending
Is unable to stop, just like our breathing.

The diary in the drawer has already turned yellow,
And pressed dry our memories.
I still remember your smile from last summer.

Our past has been forgotten as time goes by.
A love that lacked oxygen,
Requires unnecessary careless tears.

I know that it is not your fault or mine,
We just forgot how to take a step back.
We made promises to each other with confidence,
Yet it has all been emptied by time.

Although I know it is not your fault,
But it’s just that letting go would make things easier.
Nevertheless, our beautiful love will be continued in my memory.

nothing much to post 2day.

cuz 2day no paper…so could afford to wake up late =) was nearly late in meeting li shan…lol!

2day was SYF Opening Ceremony. wanted to go badly but no ticket =( and…studies come first. juz had to wish all my other NPCC buddies good luck (for those involved in the parade) and enjoy (for those going to watch the parade) here! ill always be there spiritually =) haha!

studied maths all way! 2mr will be physics! sunday will be chemistry paper 3 and maths! whole weekend filled with books, notes and practice papers!

juz recieved news that ill be nominated for the distinguished ACS(Independent) Long Service Award for Uniformed Youth Organisations. even though i didnt manage to get the prestigious Sword-of-Honour when i was Sec4…i guess this Long Service Award would be a consolation =)

taking a short break now…shall continue studying soon!

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What I want to do, you know it better than anyone else.
What you want to say, I know it all.
I have not received your call, or your voice messages. You must be missing me all alone.
No one will be able to guess that we have our own secret signal.

They may randomly anyhow guess but it is not important,
As long as we can rely on connecting to each other through our secret signal.
Too many people, too many events have been coming between us, making lots of noise.
Too many mess, too many weak signals that even the wind wants to disturb.

You said you do not want to walk in the dark underground path.
You want to enjoy yourself and freedom,
Want to be together hand in hand to see the ocean
And travel round the world freely.

I am afraid that when you are heartbroken, there will not be anyone there to help you wipe your tears.
As long as our feelings are right, why should we bother about what others say.
I am afraid that when you are heartbroken, there will not be anyone there to help you wipe your tears.
Do not leave my side, because only having you by my side will my world be perfect.

You said you want to leave, want to let go of my hand.
You said Love is too tiring, too restrictive,
Because I cannot give you the most simple promise.
You stop receiving my signal, while I start to realise that I am not able to find you.
What must I do before you will receive the secret signal again?

yes! at last im done with 1 subject: English =)

there is still…
1)   History HL Paper 3
2)   Chemistry HL Paper 3
3)   Physics SL
4)   Maths HL

English paper 2 wasnt too bad 2day. i could actually write 3 and a half sides without stunning! LOL! 2mr got no paper =) so ill juz do some light studying 2day (muz still prepare 4 maths especially)…relax relax abit…if nt will be too stressed.

lol…then can recharge battery abit…then 2mr, sat and sun can chiong all e way =) after all its only 1 more week (trying 2 be optimistic and doing some self comfort here..lol!)

shall go do my light studying now =)

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An old yellow lamp with time beside me, not making a sound.
Loneliness mercilessly attacks me, not knowing the intensity of the pain.
Quietness has turned into strangeness, quietly looking at the sunrise and sunset.

Your silhouette losing balance, falling slowly.
Darkness is already encircling us in the sky. I cannot see where I should be facing.
Perhaps love is at the other end of a dream, unable to survive in the realms of reality.

I want to return to the past, to try and hug you,
Seeing your blushing face that reveals your childish side.
I want to see the world you see, want to be in your dreams.
Only if we lean on each other then can we feel the sweetness.

I want to return to the past, to try and allow the story to continue,
At least I will not allow you to leave me again.
I will take note the next time we part that I should hug you even tighter.
My effort in trying to salvage this relationship does not know if it is in time.

Emotions keep stopping the memories from playing in my head,
Blinding chasing and looking yet it is all in vain.
On a grey and unclear night, I do not know where sleep is.
Before I know it, loneliness is already lying beside me.

yay! 2mr is my last paper of the week!

but i shldnt be happy abt it…cuz i still hav another week to go =(

2day’s chemistry paper…i bombed it totally =( although possibility of passing is high but i doubt i will get a 6 or 7 =( MCQ was a killer…think i minus nearly 10marks liao =( haiz…  paper 2 was a 3/4 killer…i was juz stunned! suddenly couldnt remember definitions…die die die!!!

history paper wasnt too bad except that i tot USSR was part of Asia…although it seems that it is considered part of Europe instead =( well…

2mr is english paper 2…muz study 4 it if nt ill never get my target of 38pts (4 now…lol)! i intend to aim for at least 40pts by my prelims so i can get my scholarship and go to my dream sch (Imperial College…its in London, England)!

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Walking along the busy streets,
but you do not hold my hand anymore.
I carefully hold your little finger,
Tears fall gently down.

I know you have been hiding some things from me,
But in the end, you still had to say it to me.
You said, "We can still be friends." Even though it was emotionless,
I saw your tears and they felt like a knife cutting through my heart.

I know after our seperation you will not be sad
Because you are happier than before.
Yet how do you expect me to say words of congratulation to you?

Did our past happiness fade in colour?
I’d like to ask how could you bear to let it go.
Do not tell me anymore that you will still miss me.

History Paper 1 2day wasnt too bad =) i think i can do relatively well…even though i din managed to finish up my last qns =( but shldnt be a problem!

2mr is my 1st doomsday!!! I havent finish studying my chemistry =(

Haiz…trying 2 study now…but nothing is going into my head =( i guess im juz not cut out to be a chemist but no choice =( ill juz hav 2 try my best for now! and work really really hard towards the IB Exams in November!

Hope i can do well 2mr even though i know my own limits…but as long as i can pass my chem 4 now…im happy cuz i know i did not put in as much effort as i shld =(

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I have only left for a short while yet I am already starting to worry about how you are doing today.
I cannot fall asleep because my mind is filled with you; 
Your cute expression when you pout, and also the fragrance from you.
I will always smile when I think about you; You are my happiness.

When you are not here, it is so hard for me to bear.
When I do not think about you, I become so troubled.
Breaking through the clouds, I tried my best to run to you.
Just when I arrive with love, you were already in someone else’s arms.

I just cannot open my mouth to let you know,
But I will surely protect you and make you laugh.
I regret not letting you know how important you are to me;
Quietly listening to you whine and watching you sleep till we grow old.

I just cannot open my mouth to let you know,
I cannot bring myself to say those mere simple sentences.
My whole heart hangs in the air while I can only watch from afar.
I know I can say those three words but that person is already not me.

This is probably the only time i feel so motivated to study History SBQ =)

i am not complaining here though…im juz glad i hav found my motivation! really hope to improve on my history score cuz i hav always been scoring below my potential =( this common test could be the right time for me 2 be awake from my slumber!

yet i feel so helpless when i see one of my fren feeling so sad and emo =( i wish i could offer my help but i am caught up with my exams. juz hope my fren will know that i will always be there to offer moral support and if necessary, i will try my best to help and support my fren in every way i can! to me, frenship takes priority =) (like they always say…frens r like diamonds: rare and precious)

I want to be the sky so I can fly to you anytime

english paper 1 wasnt too bad i guess =)

the poem was rather difficult for me…although most ppl tried the poem question. i did the prose question without much difficulty even though i am not totally confident of getting above 20marks (full marks is 25).

2day is only the start of a 2-week ordeal..hope i can pull through this!

On a side note…
something has been bothering me =( although i dunno how it all ended up like this…i want to believe that everything will return to normal. it seems like i am the cause of all the mess…yet i dunno how to pick up the pieces =( although i wish to ask…but i lack the courage to…perhaps time will tell.

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The sky that has not been sunny for a long time still keeps your smile as before.
I am still unable to bury my guilt through my tears.
The kite stranded in the gloomy sky is awaiting to be rescued,
Just like my heart that longs for you.

The loneliness that has been isolated by one side,
Is laughing at the promises that I cannot afford to give.
Yet how come you have actually forgiven me? (or maybe not)

I can only forever read our dialogues,
Reading the pain that I have given you.
I cannot forgive myself, so please treat as if I am not here anymore

I look at the blank space with eyes wide open,
trying to forget the expectations you had of me.
After finish reading how much I have depended on you,
I will leave very soon.

Ill be sitting in the examination in abt 14hrs time…

2day…went to the hospital to visit my classmate. hope she gets well asap! =)

managed to find time to catch up with the rest of the class and of cuz study as well..haha! can u imagine seeing 6ppl studying in a patient’s room? i think its the stress getting into us..lol!

now my family busy preparing for my uncle’s wedding and moving of house.

for me…
its 2 whole weeks of exams! ill try to put all my strength into this exam even though i know im nt 100% prepared =(

To my classmates and schmates:
Good luck! May we all do our best and strive for better results!

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How am I going to hide my unhappiness?
The fragrance of your hair still lingers in the place where I lost you.
I am starting to be unable to catch up.

With my eyes closed,
I can still see the traces of your departure.
I will keep searching under the moonlight
For that silhouette that I am thinking of.

If breaking up can said to be the starting point of pain,
Then before I reach the final destination, I am willing to love once again.
However, will anyone be able to understand the love I have for you,
Because I dare not express that love.

I will stare into space, trying to forget you
And then I will tightly close my eyes,
Thinking about the day when there will be someone who will take your place
So that I will not think about you anymore.

I will stare into space, break into a smile,
And then I will tightly close my eyes.
Remembering your tender face before I can finally forget all about it.

The tears in my heart have blurred my vision
So much that I cannot see you anymore.